A letter to me

Dear Me,
     I know that you are nearing 40, but it is time to take a little stock in your life.  When you were 17 you found out you were pregnant and gave birth to a son.  You spent two years giving him your very best, only to have him ripped from you by a crappy court.  You then married a man who wanted you to be something you weren't but you tried and tried and still after almost 8 years you just couldn't do it anymore.  Through all of that time, you had a mother who spent her days making sure you knew how you were the one who screwed everything up.  She never forgave you for the things that happened with your son in 1993.  You both tried to make things better.  You had an argument and said the things that needed to be said.  And you thought things were going well.  You moved around a little and finally ended up back home in your hometown.  But you are nearing 40 and things can and do change.  Tonight kind of solidified the constant problems between you and your mother.  She is set  in her ways and obviously doesn't want to change.  You can't please her so why do you even try.  It does you no good to try and make her happy when she is obviously miserable and likes it that way.  You made an honest mistake today and instead of asking why and trying to understand, she blew it out of proportion and made ugly statements about it on Facebook.  I enjoy Facebook just as much as the next person, but sometimes its just SO STUPID.  You have a daughter who loves you and a husband who thinks you are wonderful.  Why are you so stuck on trying to please a miserable woman?  Yes she is your mother and I know you love her.  But when is it ever going to be good enough for her?  Let me tell you, it's not.  You have made some gradual changes in your life lately.  And you are taking the steps in the direction of making your dreams come true.  I hope and pray to the Goddess that your mother grows up and realizes how wonderful a person you are, but unfortunately I don't think it will ever happen.  She is angry about, whatever, and she doesn't want to try and make amends for it.  You have apologized and apologized to her for everything, but it will be up to her whether she accepts those apologies.  You can't keep worrying about whether or not she approves.  You are a grown woman and the only approval you need is your own.  Keep the faith my sister, my friend.  The Goddess is watching out for you and will be there when you need her most.  Blessed Be!